返回列表 回復 發帖

NFL Jerseys Wholesale From China ” she said. “Every time he beat me

By Sunita SamarooThey have been married for the past seven years and apart from her young daughter, at times, the only testimony of their bond has been a battered face and memories of countless traumatic experiences.Domestic ViolenceIn fact, this September would have marked eight years since they joined in holy matrimony. But Nancy (not her real name) wants out.Now living with her mother, this woman says she will never feel the same and though she is fighting to move on, the experiences she had with Greg (not his real name) will haunt her.To the outsider, this family looked happy, but life at home wasn’t so pretty. Soon after they got married, verbal abuse and temper tantrums flared and the physical abuse came later, leaving her at a loss to explain why her husband, a Police Sergeant, was doing this.Nancy tells that there are many medical documents lodged with the police, but beyond lip service from officials, nothing has ever been done. Their words, that she had wed Greg for better or for worse, are ones that she remembers like yesterday.Struggling as an abuse victim for years, Nancy is now rebuilding her life.She describes the experience as one marred by stress and continuous pain and among her worries, she admitted to Kaieteur News, is her daughter’s future.In fact, Nancy said concerns over her daughter’s future are what drove her to get out.“I worried about her and growing up thinking this is right. For her to see a man hitting me, she can’t grow up thinking it’s alright for a man to beat her, because her mother used to be beaten by her father.  I don’t want her to grow up thinking it. I don’t want her to fall into that pattern,” she remarked.“I had enough…He tried to kill me so many times,” she said.Nancy says a single figure on the amount of times she was battered by Greg would be hard to draw, but her advice to women is to get out before it’s too late.“Women, you need to start loving yourself. Start choosing you first. Don’t stay in it because of your children. By the end of the day, they have lives of their own that they will attend to. Get out, because it’s the right thing to do. You deserve to be happy. You don’t deserve to have anyone knocking at you. You deserve to have a better life.”This, Nancy admits, is what she now tells herself.MARRIAGE AND CONSTANT ABUSE    Nancy met Greg when she was 18. One evening she accompanied a friend to lodge a police report. He started courting her and one year later, Greg ‘got on his knees’ and asked her to be his wife.They wed in September 2007 and soon moved into a house on Laing Avenue, West Ruimveldt but it was three months after that the abuse started. Nancy said she went to visit her mother and had told Greg of this. But when she returned he was displeased. She said the attempt on her part that day to explain herself paved way for a severe trashing which left her with many black-and-blue marks about her body.The ordeal, she recalled, lasted for about an hour and despite her pleas, he continued the beating. She tried to leave the house that night but he refused to let her go, and it was not until he had fallen asleep that night that she managed to sneak out and went to her mother’s place.She moved back in, however, with an apologetic Greg.After each fight, she said “It does start with a good treatment for about two or three months.” She recalls being constantly told that he wants the marriage to work,Cheap NFL Jerseys, that they wed “for better or for worse.”But the cycle continued.Four months later, the fighting started again; this time also because she went out with her mother. This time it was because she went to buy groceries with her and he had returned home before she did.Upset about her outing, he attacked her with his tongue, pressing her to answer why she had gone out for such a “long time” and her answer that she had no friends and chose to spend time with her mother, her only friend, did nothing to appease his anger.Nancy chose to go into the bedroom, but as the door was closing, Greg charged towards her and started hitting her, bashing her on her face and her head. After suffering terrible blows, he took her to the hospital the next morning for treatment.She moved out and Greg came begging, stating that he was willing to undergo counseling. Though his promise never materialized, she moved back in. Three months later,Cheap Jerseys For Sale, he was at it again and she recalls vividly, the words of those who convinced her she should stay.NO FRIENDS AND INTERVENTIONSGreg did not like the idea of her having any friends.  According to Nancy, who is 15 years younger than Greg, she had friends, but over time she lost them because of Greg’s disapproval. “He tell me I can’t have friends and that I don’t have any friends he approves of,” she said.She explained that she sought help from the church and welfare officers, and even from several high-ranking officials of the Guyana Police Force, but those efforts bore no fruit. She was still being battered and they would advise them to “work it out” and get back together because they vowed “for better or for worse.”Her husband would be calm but in a matter of two months, she would again be his punching bag.“The abuse is tremendous. When you make the report and you think something gun happen, nothing does…We gon deh good one minute and the next couple minutes, he is abusive. I don’t want to turn up dead one day,” Nancy lamented.“He is going to keep doing this until one day he gives me an unlucky blow and I die,” she said. “Every time he beat me, we go to the station,Wholesale Adidas Hockey Jerseys, somebody playing they talk to we saying ‘Man thing will get better. Y’all talk back to one another’ and it ain’t getting better…My daughter can sit down and talk about the abuse, how much time she see daddy knock mommy.”He never changed.“REMORSE” AND THE REASON SHE STAYED“I was staying because (my daughter) is five and at night she would come and ask ‘Mommy where daddy?’ He comes home and he put her in his arms, they lie down and sleep. Those are things that she looks forward to, and it would be wrong of me to take that from her but if I die, she won’t have a mother.”“I going through this abuse seven years and it’s not getting any better,” Nancy lamented.After every ordeal, she would notice a change in Greg’s behaviour. Seemingly out of regret, he cleans and takes care of her. She said he would cook lunch for her, drop it off at work; actions she had believed indicated he wanted to change.“Like six months after, we deh good. I feel like this man gun change,” she said.She said when they moved to La Parfaite Harmonie on the West Bank of Demerara, he “eased down” until the day he found out she had posted a picture with her and some friends on Facebook.Nancy recalls that he came home as she was lying on the bed next to her daughter, dragged her out by her hair to the bedroom, and cuffed her to her face leaving her to struggle on the bathroom floor. She got up and he kept cuffing her and she fell flat on her back.Her daughter woke up and came running to her, acting as a shield, but that did nothing to stop Greg’s onslaught. The child, she said, spoke about the story continuously.“If you see my face…When he do he mischief, he does stay home. He don’t go to work and he stays home all the time,Cheap Adidas NHL Jerseys, pampering me, but it’s always at the back of your mind.”“I think he beat me about three hours straight and she was crying begging ‘Daddy done, daddy done, daddy done! Stop knock mommy!’ but he wasn’t stopping. The abuse was tremendous and I don’t know if it will finish,” she said.LEAVINGShe said on countless occasions she would beg him for them to separate and after each encounter, she said she would look at him differently.“He would look sick, like he needs help, because some of the things he knocks me for, makes no sense. It ain’t mek no sense knocking me, it’s not necessary…I tried.”But the last straw came on February 24, last, when she returned from classes.She came home around 22:00 hours and he was upset. Nancy recalls him pouncing on her. He slammed her to the wall asking angrily “this is the hour you come in this house?”He dragged her to the toilet by her hair and continued beating her. She told him she had enough and wanted to leave, but it did not sit well with Greg. Her daughter was sleeping, but was awakened by the ruckus and despite the little girl’s cries, her father did not stop.She called 911 that night and though he tried to stop her from leaving,NBA Jerseys From China, they eventually ended up at La Grange Police Station.“He makes it seem like every time he knocks me, it’s my fault…the situation is not changing. He gon be good then he gun start again,Cheap Jerseys,” she lamented.“I decided that this was the time I am moving out and I am doing with a divorce…it’s really frustrating and after a time, it starts playing with your mind,” she said.“I am afraid that some day he may give me some unlucky blow and that may be the end of it…When I’m gone who is going to be there for my daughter? I am tired. I am exhausted, going through this year by year,” Nancy remarked.She is looking to have a better future.Today is International Women’s Day and Nancy’s story is one of thousands worldwide.